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Realizing that, no, it is not RIGHT nor NORMAL for chapters to go on for upwards of 35 pages, I've split the remainder of Chapter 2 into a whole new entity. So this is what's left of Chapter 2 -- about 2000 words. Not really enough to merit a whole second part, but such is the way of life and LJ formatting. Enjoy!
 

 

Chapter 2 Part II )


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The second chapter is running way too long (20 Word pages and counting), so I've decided to split it in two in order to save my readers an undue amount of scrolling. Unbeta'd; I've been over and over and over it myself. Tell me if you catch anything. As always, Luca's voice gives me trouble, so forgive me if it's hard going. We're still getting to know each other, he and I.





CHAPTER II

The God and the Satyr

Every boy-brothel in Paradiso had an altar for the whore god. )
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So the first chapter of the NEW and IMPROVED and SHINY "Golden Bird" is ready to be beta'd. Any brave volunteers?

Also, I am doing NaNoWriMo. Given that I already have 10,000 written, I am somewhat cheating. Shh.

http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/701017


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I'm officially declaring "The Golden Bird" closed for maintenance.


Reading back on what I've written, it's become clear that major revisions are needed, especially in the area of backstory and character development. This is the first major work of fiction I've ever written, and I feel I've made a lot of rather amateurish mistakes. I also think that I've suffered from not having a beta to tell me what works and what doesn't.

So, the plan is to add a prologue, remove/change/add/expand upon several characters (NOT Robert or Luca), and generally prune and polish where prunes and polish are needed. I don't know how long this will take, but I'm estimating 1-3 months. brianwillis44 has magnanimously offered to beta, and I'm wondering whether any other kind souls would be interested in giving the rewrite a once-over after I've finished. If so, please PM me.

THE PLOT WILL NOT CHANGE. I will also be leaving up the chapters I've already posted, at least until I finish the rewrite. I will still be active on livejournal and posting other works of [smutty] fiction.

Thanks to everyone who's read and enjoyed this story. I hope you'll like it even better once the rough edges have been smoothed out.

 

Um. Also? Please don't kill me.

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